Master Of Ceremony Jokes

need joke?
Mrs Lay:I was really insulted at that fancy party last night.
Mrs Lee:Why?What happened?
Mrs Lay:The Master Of Ceremony asked me to take off my
mask.He said it was scary.
Mrs Lee:And you didn’t want to remove it?
Mrs Lay:I wasn’t wearing one!!
try these….
1
Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.
Instead of characteristically telling her it’s not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. “If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds.”
Willing to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.
“How long will this take?” she asks.
“They’ll grow larger over a period of years,” he replies.
The wife stops. “Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?”
“Worked for your butt, didn’t it?”
He lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..
2
Man driving down road.
Woman driving up same road
They pass each other
Woman yells out her window, “PIG!”
Man yells out his window, “B.I.T.C.H!”
Man rounds next curve
Crashes into a huge pig in middle of road.
Thought For The Day : If only men would listen.
3
The mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple’s
house. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her
daughter-in-law standing naked by the door.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the
daughter-in-law
answered.
“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.
“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.
“Love dress? But you’re naked!”
“My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it
makes me
happy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home
from
work any minute.”
The mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the
way
home she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed,
showered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally
her
husband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress” she replied.
“Needs ironing.” he said.
HEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
Intel Variety Show 2011 MC Joke Montage
|
|
Master of Ceremony MC Degree: Custom Gag Diploma Doctorate Certificate (Funny Customized Joke Gift – Novelty Item) $13.99 One customized novelty certificate (8.5 x 11 inch) printed on premium certificate paper with official border. Includes embossed Gold Seal on certificate. Custom produced with your own personalized information: Any name and any date you choose…. |